more on women and football

"I would be surprised if Argentina didn't win this" - my (Australian) wife Kim, after Argentina had scored their fourth goal against S&M.





During the Angola vs Portugal match the TV commentators mentioned something about World Cup groups, prompting my confused wife to ask "Do they get three points for every goal?"





Watching Germany/Costa Rica here in the States with the better half, when the TV commentator makes a mention of the "12th Man":
She: What did he mean, 12th man? I thought there were 11 players?
Me: There are only 11 players.
She: I only see 10.
Me: Including the keeper?
She: Oh... so who is the 12th man? One of the substitutes?
Me: It's a term for the home fans.
(5 seconds of silence)
She: So how do they choose what fan gets to play? Is it random or did they win a contest?
Jesus wept.





Whilst watching the opening game of the world cup I tried to get my girlfriend Julie to take an interest and was talking about Jens Lehmann. I mentioned that he's an Arsenal player and that being an Arsenal supporter I wanted him to have a good tournament. She replied. "How can he play for Germany if he's an Arsenal player?"





Commentator: "He was unable to train due to a cruciate knee injury."
The lovely Lady: "So what knee is more crucial than the other?"







I work with a bird who having watched the Italy - Ghana game, came into the office and said, "Which one of the Ghana players plays for the Czech Republic?" Her name is Lisa H, and she is a constant source of entertainment.







From a girl in my office during a conversation detailing the finer points of qualification from the group stages; "What happens if England and Sweden win all their group games?"






I'd just turned on the France/Switzerland game when my sister-in-law perched on the sofa next to me, took a look at the the ticker at the top of the screen - FRA v SWI - and asked "Why are France playing Swindon?"







Whilst watching the opening between Germany and Costa Rica, my wife challenged me with the following questions: "When a team scores a goal and the players jump on each other to celebrate, do they ever jump on someone from the other team by mistake? And if they do, has that ever started a fight?"








My wife was watching the England v Jamaica warm-up game and commented "It's not fair - England won't give the other team the ball.









While watching England v T&T my friend's bird who for the life of me I can't remember the name of cos I don't pay attention, but she does look a little like the bird from Harry Potter says... "Can goalkeepers use their feet?" I just looked at her and shook my head.








Watching football with my girlfriend on Sunday I was talking about exactly where I was going to watch England's next game, my girlfriend asked "So who do we play next then?" I said that our next game was on Thursday against Trinidad & Tobago to which she replied with a puzzled look on her face, "what, both of them?".








My receptionist - "When are england playing next?"
Me - "Tomorrow morning, 2am"
Receptionist - "Who against?"
Me - "Trinidad and Tobago"
Receptionist ' "TWO GAMES?"





...I was out having a smoke after the games on Saturday, when I heard a great exchange between two random drunken birds which went as follows.
Random bird one: "Did you see any of the football today?"
Random bird two: "No, why? Who won?"
Random bird one: "England beat Sweden, and Trinidad drew with Tobago"










...My girlfriend Jackie used to think that "injury time" was the time at the end of the match when both teams tried to injure the opposion!










...I have just got tickets for Brazil v Australia. I am obviously excited. I tell my other half. Her reaction: "Why would you want to go and see Brazil play"